Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Welcome to my world; have a seat, enjoy a beverage & let the show begin. :)

I decided to start a blog as a way to both stretch my writing muscles and to tear down, brick by brick, the walls I've spent most of my life building. I have lots of secrets!  I've practically made a career of hiding myself from the world. I've decided that all this self-censorship weighs me down; keeps me from being my truest self. I have lots of stories to tell. And hopefully, I'll learn a few new things about myself as I write. I like that idea  very much! When I set up this blog I put it into the adult content category because at some point I will include things of an adult nature. I don't see that being frequent though. When I do, I'll always put a disclaimer of some sort at the beginning....I promise!

So you may be wondering what the title of my blog means. I have this phrase tattooed on me. So I hear the question a lot. My first feeling at being asked what it means is that if you have to ask, you probably aren't going to get it anyway. And I kind of hate trying to explain it. It's intensely personal to me. It's a long story/short story thing where I could just give you the short story but you wouldn't get the depth of it's meaning to me. But to give you the long story would be ridiculously long winded and more than likely boring for you. I'd like to avoid that.

So short story is that while in a group therapy setting, we were given the task of creating a poster board depicting visualizations of our dream life; concrete and non-concrete things. We went through bunches of magazines to find pictures & words that we could cut out and use. I found this ad in a magazine that was for some RV association. The ad showed a couple inside their RV with a huge picture window out the back of it. Behind them was the most picturesque landscape ever. The kind that makes you think "I want to go THERE!". The tag line in the ad was something to the effect that life should be about the "goosebumps, tingly sensations & butterflies"; those moments that make you feel connected to the energy of life. Well, I had just left behind a life of doing the things that brought OTHER people those moments but that mostly missed the mark for myself. Taking those words to heart meant that for me, from then on, I wanted to be sure that I was filling my life with those kinds of moments.

I'm glad I got it tattooed on myself. It really does serve to keep reminding me. Everyday life has a way of distracting you from your dreams and numbing out the "goosebumps". But that phrase keeps me focused on the good stuff; the meaningful stuff. The stuff of my dreams.

2 comments:

  1. Yay!!! I promise to be a faith follower and encourager!!

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  2. Yay...great start Brenda...looking forward to more. Youre an inspiration!

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